Queen Rose

Poor old Lee didn’t turn up today as he wasn’t well. I do feel sorry for him but on the other hand I am doing my complete and utter nut here, surrounded by DUST and MESS and power tools in THE WRONG PLACES, like EVERYWHERE. Anyway he’s just texted to say he will be here tomorrow. Part of me hopes he is ok and not overdoing it, another part wonders has he got anything that can infect a baby and the biggest, ugliest part of me, with the loud voice and fake nails, doesn’t give a stuff about cross infection and just wants everything finished.

I had my nails done for the first time ever last week and it’s strangely like having building work done on your fingers: the process includes smoothing rough surfaces, power tools, use of fillers and strong solvents, cups of tea and considerable discomfort. I really don’t get the whole pampering thing, maybe one day I will go to a spa where they actually do agreeable things to you. I just don’t see how having your face sanded is at all nice. Why can’t they have spas where they make you drink hot chocolate while dangling your toes in a pond of fish that gently nibble away the dead skin from your bunions. Or eat cake while being pushed in a vibrating swing in front of a Fred and Ginger movie. Fun things.

Me and K have started project babysit in which we are going to leave our babies in the care of the other person now and again in order to get them used to being away from us for a bit, the idea being to prepare for us abandoning them when we return to work. I went over to K’s and took care of the babies while she did some gardening. It all went quite well, I put them on a mat and retired to the sofa. They sort of gazed at one another and grabbed toys off one another with perfect equanimity until Rose started crying which set P off. We managed over half an hour which I thought was quite good. K’s turn next! She has loads more baby skills than me so I should be able to go out for a movie and a meal afterwards before I’m needed.

In the morning Rose spent ages perfecting her tummy skills, she is now able to prop herself up on one elbow while waving to an imaginary crowd. Born to rule.

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